How Racist

Ok ok ok... we know how fucked up things are in Kenya right. These people are in desparate need of help..

Never Fear!!!! Whites To Tha Rescue:


Kenya rejects aid of 'dog food'

Kenya's government is outraged by an offer of food aid from a New Zealand dog food manufacturer to help the 4m people hit by drought.

But Christine Drummond told the BBC she could assure Kenyans that the nutritional supplement she was offering was "definitely not dog food".
It is "a high-powered food full of nutrients. It tastes yummy," she said.

The minister co-ordinating the relief effort, John Munyes, told the AFP news agency the offer was in "bad taste".
Kenyan government spokesman Alfred Mutua told Kenya's Daily Nation newspaper that any food aid must be up to standard.
"Kenyan children are not in such shortage of food to resort to eating dog food," he said.

'Loving country'

The founder of the company which makes Mighty Mix dog biscuits says her freeze-dried Raw Dry Nourish is "like having a big meal in a teaspoon".
"I have been formulating it for special people like in Kenya, the people who need it the most to keep strong," Ms Drummond told the BBC's Focus on Africa programme.

She was originally quoted in the Daily Nation as saying she wanted to send dog biscuits but when she heard how many people needed food aid, decided to send the powder.

But she said that this was a misunderstanding and her only desire had been to help malnourished children in Kenya.

"I am offering a natural food supplement... I am donating this food out of the goodness of my heart and to try and show that New Zealand is a loving country," Ms Drummond said.

She said she sprinkles the powdered supplement on her porridge every morning.

Kenya's Director of Medical Services Dr James Nyikal said: "There is no way that the ministry can allow dog food mixture to be brought in for human consumption."


Kenya has declared a national disaster because of the food shortages, which follow poor rains across the north.


Racist - rac·ism ( P ) Pronunciation Key (rszm)n.
The belief that race accounts for differences in human character or ability and that a particular race is superior to others.

Discrimination or prejudice based on race.

Sending dog food to starving black people "to keep them strong"



*...better dem sen dem some turn cornmeal an liver dont? Pussies...

How You Know Your About To Lose Your Job

The phone rings so I get it. It's a woman who wants to talk to my boss about the girl for the job that they spoke about on Thursday. Ha... cant trick me!! I know whats up.

"Sorry Mr. Bossman isn't hear right now, but I'll be sure to give him the message."

Bossman "Any calls for me Anthony?"

"Not one yu nuh."

Cow Itch Invasion!!!

Now for the past week I've been thinking I must be losing my mind. I've ben itching like crazy, and yes I do bathe thoroughly & often. So here I am thinking that all the shit I've ever done to people, animals or places have finally caught up with me. Maybe there is some truth to that sins biting you myth, but if that was so i'm sure i would of been dead within the first 5 mins. of the epidemic.

But I mean some serious itching. Thought I had leprasy or some shit. My eye lash itched. Now I couldn't tell anybody seeing as how my family already believes that I'm a few cards short of full deck so this would only confirm my admission to Bellvue. (I've heard them whisper "All we need is two signatures yu nuh, jus two and we get rid of him").

So i go on a cleaning spree. It must be something in my room thats causing this. I clean, I wash, I scrub, I disinfect... nothing. I cant take it anymore. I gotta tell somebody.

"I cant stop itching!!"

Aunty "Guh Bade. Nasty yu nasty!"

"I've taken like 8 showers in the past 12 hours. That cant be healthy."

"A joke, is cow itch a blow in the wind."

Now here I am thinking about every questionable piece of ass i've had in the past 2 yrs, only to realise that its on of those "only in jamaica" phenomenons. Cow itch pollen seems to be jus floating in the air. Yep jus that simple. Just floating around and landing on eveything and everyone. All those baths only made it worse cause the little friggers found there way to my towel & rag.

Now while I am comforted to know that my sanity remains in tact, I'm now known for scratchin uncontrollably in public. So yes I'm now perceived as a nasty raas. But guys I swear... It was the cow itch!!

Dead End Job

We've all gone through it, some of still are. The dead end job that isn't benefiting us in any way other than contributing to the bills. We drag ourselves out of bed even before the sun or god, for that matter, wakes up in the useless effort to beat the misery that is rush hour traffic. To my St. Catherine friends my heart goes out to you.

Our journey is not only made miserable by the traffic, but for those of us who try to listen to the radio are made nauseous by the mindless ramblings of the eeeediat morning personalities. "Make me Laugh" makes you dry heave at the sound of Dorraine's hhee hee hee's and ha ha ha's. The jokes are, have not, never will be even mildy amusing. As a matter of fact they're downright depressing.
Francois's "Goooooooood Mooooorning Jaaaaaaaa-maaaaiiiicaaaaaaaa!!!!" makes me wanna do a drive by on the RJR building and hurl coktail bombs at it.
I get exhausted just listening to Jenny Jenny's bubbly personality. (you know she might be on drugs right? nobody's that happy)

So we've already started the day on a good foot. We finally get to work and keep try to remind ourselves why we're here.

"Have to pay off that loan"

"Mortgage due this month"

"I bet the fassy dem a guh cut of mi phone today"

"Jah know.. baby modda a stress mi pocket"

So we muster up the motivation and get out of the car. You reach the elevator and the president or senior management is in there with you. You decide to entertain yourself a bit, and just as you appraoch your floor you let one rip (has to be a silent one) and step out. Hey your already having a bad day. The satisfaction of having farted on your boss muss ease some of your frustration. I can testify to that.

Reach the office/desk/cubcile/intergalactic spaceship (or whatever you pretend it to be so you don't go postal on everybody) and go through the motions. You pencil push, file, answer phones, take verbal abuse from customers, managers, co-workers, janitors ("yu need fi move yu nuh cause mi haffi clean dis spot right now an mi nuh business wah yu a do... work me a work") and you realise that the world hates you.

So what am i doing? Well you sacrifice time, energy, emotions and sanity to do a good job for someone else. Your unappreciated and sometmes viewed as ungrateful. After all, look how much mad man on the road. I say it was their 9-5 that made them that way. What about the crack you ask. It was their job that made em do it. So I think its time to put that energy into something else. Find your niche and work with it. If you find yourself not enjoying your work, so much so you end up writing blogs, and viewing pages such as www.stickpage.com (great site by the way) just to keep you entertained you need to step up your game. Note that what you do in life isn't dependent on what you studied in school either. Take Angry Bob for example. Who would have known he studied at a "pretigious" university? What does he do now? He takes pictures. Yep. It's that simple. And oh yea... he gets paid too.

Really though life is way too short for us to be spending it making other people happy when both you and they know that you wont succeed. So make yourself happy I say. Go to work if you feel like it. Take long breaks, leave early and don't tell anybody. Whatever makes you happy. It's time for us to start treating ourselves and making us happy.

More Local Television Torture

Started thinking about commenting on the Bmobile Singles show on CVM. Now I'm thinking maybe i shouldn't contaminate the blog with that fuckery. Or maybe i just don't think they're worth the attention.

What do you guys think?

Witness Woes

It's not easy being a Jehova's Witness. Imagine walkin around in mid-day sun tryin to spread the word dressed in a jacket & tie or that repulsive frock. (I for one never understood dressing up like that in a tropical climate, can you imagine the sweat).

Yes they stroll around with huge umbrellas & big hats looking for heathens to convert. Armed with their M16's (M for Mark) and the Holy Spirit, this battalion marches through communities spreading "the word" to whoever will listen, despite verbal attacks from the not-so-righteous mobs.

"Unnu a pray to white man!!!"

"Full Time Jehova witness YOU a fuck some pum pum!!" (tenx Twins)

"Oh.. Suh yu a witness... We shot informa roun here!"

They've been comin to my house for years. I could never figure out how to get them to stop. My fault really. The one time you entertain them you'll be guarenteed a visit the following week... and the week after that.... and the week after that. Very persistent set. Trust me on this.

So after you've accommodated them once, how do you get them from stop coming?

Well here's a few of things to say when caught in that position

1. "Umm... Jehova? Isn't that Jay-Z?"

2. "And you know... i was just watching Jesus Christ Superstar"

3. "You guys are jus in time for the seance. Hope ya brought incense"

4. "Our Dark Lord welcomes you"


But the one my granma tells me works the best is:

"Hello my brothers & sisters. Praise Jehova"
(If your a witness they aint got no reason to come back)


If ya'll can think of more discouraging statements to say to these freaks, let me know.